The Joel Annals

That's ANNALs. With TWO "n"s.

Okay, so Jean and Joel and I are driving home from Rent last night. It was at the Ordway (which is right downtown St Paul, so we just take 3rd street all the way down. And it was so good. I cried lots.). So anyway, we're driving home; it's 10:45 PM. Now, 3rd Street between downtown and our house is NOT the best neighborhood. Nay, it's maybe one of the worst two neighborhoods in St Paul. But, you know, we just keep driving; it's not like it's the South Side of Chicago; don't-live-your-life-in-fear, all that rot.

So Jean's driving, and Joel's shotgun.

Joel: "How fast are we going?"

Jean: "30."

Me (piping up from the back seat, because that's the only way to talk from the back seat): "Joel thinks he can run this fast!"

Joel: "No!! I said, like, 20!"

(Aside: this is referencing a conversation Joel and I had a couple months ago, in which he claimed that, at his top speed in like high school, he could hit 20 mph. Or maybe 30.)

Me: "Well, either way, you can't run that fast."

Joel: "Can too!"

Jean: "Here, Joel, get out of the car and run. We'll drive next to you and tell you how fast you're going."

At which, Joel actually unbuckles his seat belt and pops his door open. Mind you, we are still driving. Jean quickly pulls the car over to the curb, and Joel hops out and takes off down the street ahead of us. I don't know how Jean is able to drive, because I am laughing so hard my face is starting to cramp up. But she starts the car moving, and soon is going about 10 mph.

I stick my head out the window to holler our speed at Joel, who is tearing up the street in his dress shirt, dress pants, tie, and dress-shoes-with-the-holes-in-the-soles-because-he-won't-take-himself-shoe-shopping.

Me (as we approach him from behind): "10! Honey! We're going ten miles per hour!"

Joel: "Ten!! No prob--"

At which point, of course, Jean and I had already FLOWN by him, zipping by at the blazing speed of, of course, ten miles per hour.

But was Joel discouraged by the fact that his top speed topped out around 4 mph?? NO! He immediately (and joyfully) started handicapping himself.

"Well!" he says triumphantly, hopping back into the car, "that was in dress shoes. With holes! AND I have that broken ankle. There's 6 or 7 mph right there! And I was only jogging -- my top speed is at LEAST double that."

Within about 15 seconds he managed to talk himself back up to "about" 20 mph again.

I love that guy.

Heavy for a Friday!

I'm getting a lot of forwarded emails these days with this quote appended at the bottom:

"If you can read this, thank a teacher! If you are reading it in English, Thank a Veteran"

I totally agree with the first part.

But.

Countless thousands of U.S. Veterans have given their lives so that us Americans can enjoy Freedom: Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness. All rights, which were self-evident to Thomas Jefferson 230 years ago and remain so today.

Notice that "The English Language" doesn't appear in the Declaration of Independence, nor the Constitution, nor the Bill of Rights. And last time I checked, English is not the official language of the USA (I'm not even sure it's the official language of England, but that's another Wikipedia search, for another day). It's pure happenstance that English is the language that Americans speak today. There's no reason to believe that the American version of Democracy (which I believe, is what our military is defending), could not have sprung from people who speak French. Or Mandarin Chinese.

English is not, in and of itself, superior to other languages. It so happens that in the world today, English is a "common language" that many people around the world learn as a second (or third, or fourth) language -- this is mostly due to American culture permeating the entire globe. So what if American culture spoke Arabic instead?

I guess the reason the little quote bothers me so much is, it sounds like xenophobia. Which leads to racism, stereotyping, misunderstanding, and fear of people different from "us." Which leads to problems. More war. More bigotry. More senseless hurt.

Maybe this is more appropriate: "If you're reading this without fear, thank a Veteran." But maybe that's too esoteric of a concept for an email forward.

Preserve your mammaries

I swear, I don't mis-hear things on purpose. But I was half-watching TV, half-reading about the Twins and I heard that in the middle of a commercial for a scrapbook or something.

Saw the Dalys (Dalies?) tonight for only the second time since their new bebe was born. I miss them! We've been seeing a lot of the "Wats" recently too -- trying to cram in as much face-time as possible before they move to the 'burbs. The kids are all so adorable together. Toddlers are just incredible.

I've been chewing my fingers off this last week, stressing about work and the house. When am I going to learn not to sweat it? Why can't I just accept that things happen in due time, and that I can't control everything? Anyway, to console myself I am attending a Twins game on Friday and Rent on Saturday. I cannot decide which I am more excited about. Plus I have book club Sunday. Our Realtor is after us to repaint the kitchen and our bedroom, but I'm sorry, two people (and by two, I mean Joel) can only do SO MUCH while holding down a 40-hour-a-week job and keeping two babies clothed, diapered, and fed. At some point we have to simply say: this is it; this is the best we can do.

There is a lovely breeze in our living room as I type this. We don't get a lot of lovely breezes in our house. I'd better go do some dishes. So goes the battle.

"Projects... We Got Projects"

Or... "Would You Buy A Book Full of Little Anecdotes Like This?"


We own three good towels.

They’re not GREAT towels. I think I paid $10 apiece. But they’re big, and fluffy, and red. The red that matches our shower curtain. The red that is the accent color of the bathroom.

So we needed to paint the bathroom, and Joel took some time off work to do so (in addition to tackling about 35 other projects… and if you think I’m exaggerating, I will list them for you). And when I got home to inspect his work, I found that the paint looked fabulous on the walls (and ceiling, long story) of the bathroom.

I also found that the paint did NOT look quite as fabulous on my towels. And on my shower curtain. And all over the sink. And the toilet. And various other bathroom toiletries and accessories that were apparently too much trouble to remove from the bathroom prior to beginning a painting project.

So, like, the toiletries and shower curtain, I could see -- because the shower curtain can be bunched up in the middle of the rod, away from the walls and, ostensibly, safe from paint splatters -- and, oops, a big splatter, oh well. And paint, of course, can be scraped off a sink, floor etc.

But the TOWELS!?!? Need I remind you, we do not have some wild uber-high-tech bathroom where towels float in midair. Nay, when they are not bunched up in a puddle on the floor, our towels generally HANG FROM THE WALLS.

As a side note to other husbands who may be tempted to try this trick: interior latex paint does not machine-wash off of terrycloth.

Someday, Joel is going to be arrested and charged with murder or some other heinous crime. And he will be found Not Guilty by reason of Chronic Insanity. And all it will take... is my testimony.

OK, OK catching up...

My darling, darling son's new fun trick is waking up every two hours throughout the night. 11PM, 1AM, 3, 5... yessir, just like the sweetest little alarm clock you ever did see. He's also learned to grab things and jam them in his mouth. Which is adorable when it's his own foot, or his shirt or blanket. Less adorable when it's my hair or glasses, or the sewing shears Lucy left on the floor.

Lucy (besides being a precocious seamstress) is... Lucy. A little volatile, a lot wonderful. Her Cabbage Patch Baby is her obsession. Baby eat now. Baby ni-night. Baby milk. Where Baby? Baby soap. Baby eat again. She puts Ed's diaper on Baby, then takes it off and wipes Baby's bottom, then pantomimes putting Desitin all over Baby, from bee-bo to be-hind. We have to keep reminding her to use "pretend wipes" and "pretend soap (Desitin)", but she's awfully good about it. At dinner time, Baby sits in Lu's booster seat and gets a plate too. Lucy's lots into the pantomiming: pretending to eat cookies, drink milk, etc. which is very fun to watch and play along.

What else? Oh, we're getting the floor refinished in the living room and hallway today. And Joel's on a Projects Rampage, working late into the night finishing up the basement bathroom and various other jobs we've been putzing on for the last couple of years. He's great, albeit tired. It's been raining for the last 12 hours or so here, and it's cooled off beautifully outside. And... that might be it for now. Happy Wednesday.

Meg is an Idiot

Chapter MCMLXXVI
In which I attempt to burn down my house and kill my entire family in their beds

Replacement breast pump parts: $30
Replacement baby bottles: $13
Replacement favorite nonstick 8-quart soup pan: Who even knows; it was part of a set.
One call to Poison Control: Free, actually, it's a toll-free number.
Waking up to the smell of noxious fumes and thinking "why does my bedroom smell like noxious fumes?" and going back to sleep for a couple hours: Priceless!

Need I continue, or are you getting the gist? I got home from softball last night at 10:45 and thought it would be a good idea to sterilize my pump parts, plus some of Ed's bottles, while I showered. Only, I forgot to turn off the stove, and went to bed.

Where is tall-man?

Ed had his 4-month checkup today. He's fabulous (and very handsome, according to the doctor). 17 lbs, and a whopping 28.75 inches tall. Which explains why he's dangling out of his car seat AND why we had to raise the level of his "office" yesterday.

Update: I am NOT taking Chem this fall; I am taking Lifespan ("Developmental") Psych. Only one night a week for three hours (rather than two nights a week for eight total hours) -- MUCH better.

Other than that, we're just taking everything one day at a time -- working hard at communicating with the Pants (small victory today: she was eating a banana in the car on the way to the doc and then decided to drop the banana on the floor. But then immediately realized that that meant she could no longer reach, nor eat, it. She had a FIT and I explained that she could have the banana back once we got to the doctor's office. And that if she wanted to eat it, she shouldn't drop it. And I swear she stopped crying and said something like "Don't drop 'nana, can eat it." And I was like "YESSS!")... and enjoying our soon-to-be-departed neighbors and our Twins victories while we can. Happy Thursday!

Go Gone Went

Congratulations to Carol and Pat and Josie, who have a new baby (and sister, respectively)!
Genevieve (Eve) (not sure if I'm spelling that right) was born late Monday. Mom and baby are doing great!

Here's a quote I liked, found on my cup of Starbucks yesterday:

Wrangling fear is the biggest challenge the world faces now and the challenge we all face, now and again, at our crossroads, in the dark moments, at those times we are asked to compromise, at those times when we know deep down that we must revolutionize our own lives.
-- Holly Morris, Author of Adventure Divas: Searching the Globe for a New Kind of Heroine.

I have one of those air-conditioning colds I sometimes get in the summer. After three whole winters without a cold, it's an unpleasant surprise.

Lessee, what else is new?

Ed is still the wiggliest little guy. He flips himself onto his tummy in his crib and then gets mad when he can't get back over. He squirms over to the edge so he's sleeping with his legs hanging out between the bars. He's getting a little fiesty while feeding too -- pounding me with those tiny fists, and writhing his whole body. The other night he was playing this game while eating -- he'd look up and over to where Joel was sitting, wait for Joel to look at him, then smile a huge grin and quickly latch back on.

Lucy started saying either "I hate you" or "I hit you" last night. She said it (whatever it was) very clearly to both Joel and me, on three separate occasions. It was very creepy.

Happy Thursday

Okay, sorry if I got anybody too excited: that is not really Lu and Ed on Time. It just really, really looks like them. ***Dreaming of royalty checks...***

Get this: Eddie DID roll over last night. Back to front. Grampa R was there to witness. Yay Ed!

JT and I are going to see Liriano pitch tonight and we are BESIDE OURSELVES with excitement. Go 'Cisco!

Oh! And just in case you missed it...

My kids are on the cover of Time this week!

Really, though, the resemblance is kind of striking.

Hold me closer, Tony Danza.

Eddie is STILL not rolling over. Both Grandmas have told me, in no uncertain terms, that it'll be "any minute now." I think he's strong enough, but it's really just a question of motivation. He'll do it when he wants to.

I forgot to mention that when G&G Ryan were in for my bday, Lucy went tinkle in her little potty. Once. Under Gram's gentle encouragement. We were VERY surprised and delighted, though we have not yet been graced with an encore performance.

We can really understand what Lu's saying about 85% of the time now. It is truly amazing. Yesterday we were in the living room watching Elmo and I was feeding Ed, and Lu says, "Mocha-meese?" Which means, milk please? And I said, sure, honey, you left your milk on the kitchen table. And she said "Mommy get?" And I said, no way no way, if you want it, you get it yourself little darlin' and she sat there for a bit and thought, and then got up and got it. So cool.

I've been listening to Elton John at work this week. MAN do I love his songs! And they put me in SUCH a better mood than the 1979 recording of "Sweeney Todd."

So I'm registered for a Chemistry class (lab and lecture) at Century College this fall. Am I mental? Anyway, I had to get my old WSU transcript in order to enroll, and it was SO interesting looking at that thing. I took some weird classes. In fact, there's one class on there I have NO recollection of. Some Hallmark thing for Advertising... three credits and I got an A. Fall of 1997, I think. What??

Also! Remember Erin Davidson, who was in our wedding? Right, I barely do either. Anyway, Ellen apparently saw her on some crazy cable-TV "Pop Culture Tournament" or something, competing for like a quarter of a million dollars. Honestly, if there's anybody besides Stu who KNOWS pop culture, it's Erin. Or it was, when I last talked to her 6 years ago. So I hope she did well.

Pressure

I've been reading "Pride and Prejudice" for the first time; or rather, trying to read it. I'm sure it's an awesome book and I know it's a classic but for some reason I can't hardly make heads or tails of what half the sentences mean. I guess it's been a long time since I really had to concentrate on reading comprehension, and I can't say it makes for especially pleasurable entertainment. But I'm getting the gist of the story (I think) and I really want to see the movie(s).
Good God, someone rescue me, I've been swallowed by pop culture. I swore I'd never say "I can't get the book... bring on the movie!" Egads.

The 'Stones song "Jumpin' Jack Flash" is on the radio right now. This song always reminds me of a tongue-in-cheek radio conversation I heard once, where they were debating what exactly the refrain ("Jumpin' jack flash, it's a gas gas gas") was about. E.g. "Jumpin' jack flash is neither a solid, nor a liquid" or something like that.

I am so sorry I've been such a bad blogger. Life just isn't easy these days. "No one said it would be easy... but no one said it'd be this hard" is the Sheryl Crow line that keeps running through my head.

Let's talk current events for a stitch here. The death of Ken Lay really has me thinking. For one, I'm thinking maybe he faked it. That aside, let's say he really did pass away yesterday. What are we supposed to learn from this? That yup, you should go ahead and steal from your employees because you could die before you get sentenced? Isn't that terrible? I know the government is still seeking something like $45 million in damages from him. What happens to that, now that he's gone? What about the decades of prison time he was facing? Am I really to accept that it all just gets wiped away? I don't know, the whole thing really has me down on our justice system, and the justice of life in general. Of course, life's not fair. Worse people have probably gotten away with worse. But it really discontents (I looked it up; it's a transitive verb -- who on earth remembers what that is?) me. I'd be interested to hear what your thoughts are on this -- whether from a religious standpoint, a moral standpoint, or just a concerned-citizen's standpoint. I know my thoughts aren't really well-thought-out, for which I apologize.

This looks like enough for a post. More later, perhaps?

The fastest thing on three legs

Photos of Marnie and me, dominating our building's three-legged event yesterday. Note our intensity... and the largeish, long-legged men we vanquished.

Also note the guy on the far right in the second photo (and far left in the third photo), who, in his defense, also had to battle a couple trees.
Also, I have the race final on video, which does better justice to the actual excitement of the event. I think I can email that to you, upon request.

"How To Win Three-Legged Races and Influence People" seminars coming soon to a convention center near you!

I've received a thinly-veiled threat of being fired for internet usage at work... so I'm blogging from home.

Joel wanted to say a few things. But he won't write, so I do it for him.

We went to a movie in Alexandria over the weekend -- DaVinci Code, actually. It was decent. Cheesy... but not dreadful. As it turns out, Jesus really was a woman!
But seriously, folks, we were especially impressed by the etiquette of our fellow moviegoers. It was a teeny little theatre, with maybe only 15 rows of seats. Maybe 10. Anyway, we like to sit toward the front, but not too close, which in this case was about Row Three. Unfortunately, there was Couple #1 seated near the center of Row Four, and we thought, gee, we shouldn't plop down right in front of them. So we moved a few seats in, and sat.
So another couple comes in behind us and goes to sit in our row, but that would have landed them directly in front of Couple #1. They immediately realize this, about-face, and proceed to Row Two. It was such a lovely display of congenial Minnesotaism. I am so proud.

Okay, this next story isn't Joel's. But it's Happy To Be a Minnesotan Part Deux.
So Donald Trump was giving some get-rich-quick seminar in Minneapolis and... why am I typing this? I can just link you to the story. Click here. Okay, wait, that article doesn't exactly explain what happened... apparently only like 4,000 people showed up. Anyway, I love that.

Back to Joel's stories. He also wanted to share that this morning he popped his head into Lucy's room to wake her up, and she was sitting up in bed, so he grabbed her clothes and diaper and then went to put on his shoes and socks and gel his hair, all the while singing "Where is Thumbkin" to her. He went back into her room to get her and... no Lucy. So he peeked in the living room and there she is, laying on her back, feet in the air, just waiting for her diaper change. You have to picture it in your head, it's cute, honestly.

We had a fabulous evening tonight -- our Neighborinos had some people looking at their house, so Neighborina and the Neighboriños (plus a bonus Neighb-amiga) came over for chili *dinner. We dined in the gazebo, scarfing chili and sipping wine in between referreeing three toddlers perched on telephone books. The tods did their hilarious-toddler thing, much to our delight. After several fits, of course, regarding the proper way to serve chili (i.e. the toddler-preferred ratio of one teaspoon chili : one cup sour cream, which is not Mom's first choice).

*Chili! I invented a chili! It could NOT be easier, and so I present to you the recipe:
Three-Can-Chili
3 cooked, cubed chicken breasts (or three cooked, cubed small steaks)
1 small chopped onion (but I've made it without)
1 can corn (tonight I used 1/2 pkg frozen spinach, thawed, instead)
1 can diced tomatoes
1 can black or kidney or any other kind of beans. Or a combo, if you're doubling the recipe.
1 Tb chili powder
1/2 Tb dried cilantro
1 Tb "It's a Dilly" or dill seasoning... or not.
1 tsp cumin (but I think my beans had extra cumin in them, so maybe a little more)Shakea-shakea Tabasco, if that's your thing.

-->Make sure the meat is cooked, then sauté up the onion and add in the spinach to cook it a little, if that's what you're using. Then throw in everything else. Bring it to a boil, or don't, and then serve. You can't go wrong.

We interrupt this blog...

You will simply have to excuse my sporadic blogging. It's a difficult time right now. And on top of it all, my fridge is freezing things again. Which would be great if IT WERE A FREEZER. But if I wanted an enormous, stand-up freezer, I would certainly go out and purchase one (used, from Craig's list, most likely). What I really want, however, is a stinkin' fridge. Actually, I don't really even want a fridge, per se; to paraphrase an old Advertising-class mantra, what I want is chilled food. Chilled. Not solid-blocks-of-ice food.

At least the Twins are winning.

The real father of my child

Is the resemblance not striking? Eh, maybe not.

New blogs to keep up on...

I mentioned my cousins Bridget and Kate have new blogs. Now, you have links! Either click on their names, respectively, in the first line, or click the links on the right side of the page.

I have the song "Blood on the Coal" (from "A Mighty Wind" soundtrack) stuck in my head. Much to my chagrin and frustration. And occasional amusement.

Super-adorable Alley Kittens Available!

Remember the Alley-Kittens from yesterday? In about a month or two, they will be ready for a new home. Wouldn't you loooove to adopt one?
Email me! Free DVD/video of the birth with each adoption!

Five-part discord

I
So I'm not really sure when "bars" worked its way into the popular lexicon. I'm not talking about dessert-bars, which I think growing up we always called "cookies" or "treats" (i.e. Rice Krispie Treats or No-Bake Cookies) but apparently in Minnesota they're "bars." Rice Krispie Bars. Special K Bars. It's taken quite an adjustment on my part.
BUT! I am not talking about that. I am talking about cell-phone bars. Referring to whether or not you'll be able to make a call from whichever location you happen to be. Like, "Man, I don't have any bars! How am I going to get a hold of my babysitter?" Or, "Here, use my phone, I have at least three bars." In the last week I've heard people use the word "bars" a LOT. I have a couple of questions about this:
1. Does everyone have the same number of bars, total? My phone's max is seven bars. I suppose I could just ask some people.
2. What's the number of bars at which the quality of service suffers? Two? One?
3. If your phone goes to eight, but you only have six bars, is the quality of the phone call you're about to make really going to suffer at all?
4. Did the usage of the word "bars" come directly from AT&T's "How many bars do you have?" ads? Why can't we just say "Grr! I have no service!" I'm just not certain "bars" sounds any cooler.

II
This is really just a note to my dad: I was driving home from dropping Mom off at the airport on Saturday morning and it was such a beautiful morning so I drove home along the river and right downtown St. Paul there are some train tracks that go over the road and the river, and there was an old dude standing at the railing just gazing up at the train going right over our heads and I totally thought of you. Trains AND rivers AND a downtown area all in the same place! See, you should totally move up here. ;)

III
Jean hit a home run in our softball game. It may even have been a grand slam; I can't remember. My sister kicks butt.

IV
Joel and the kids and I were totally on TV last week! Channel 5, 10:00 news, local sports wrap -- we were watching Jean's softball team at Sectionals (which they WON, go Sibley!!) and there we were. I still haven't seen it, however.

V
Congratulations to Alley Joel and Cara, new foster parents of five teeny little Alley Kittens. Cara actually assisted in the birth. She even has it on video (what a rock star!!). I will try to get some photos but they are seriously like only 4 inches long apiece. Their little mews are the saddest thing you have ever heard, Mom ("Tails") seems to be doing fine as well... she's remarkably at ease with the Alleys handling her babies and with all of us coming and going. Lucy wasn't so thrilled about the fuzzy little ones, although, in her defense, she's kind of going through the DT's after going cold-turkey off the Nuk yesterday after we found out she chewed a hole in it and we didn't have a replacement.

Shaking the cobwebs from my mind

It's been the hardest week-and-a-half of my life. Thank you to:

• My "original" family. You are an awesome group of people. I know we will get through this together.
  
• My "new" family (JG and the babies). I love you all more every day.
  
• My friends. Your love and support is so, so appreciated.
  
• Jan's friends -- you are now my friends. This has been a terrible time, but I am so glad to have been able to get to know you. You are such cool people. Thanks for the stories and the ice cream!

Let's go back to my kids again. Just a couple updates:

Eddie has slept through the night the last 3 nights or so. All the way through. It is very nice.

Last Wednesday, after a VERY long day, I was putting Lulu to bed and we couldn't find her Nuk. Like, anywhere. And you know how she is about that thing. She was sobbing, crying for it: "Nu-huh-huh-ook." Well, we found one of Ed's nuks on the floor, and I said:
"Here, Lu, I know it's not your nuk but will it work for you? It's got to be better than nothing, right?"
Lucy: "Eddie's. Eddie's."
Me: "Yes, it's Eddie's, but you can use it now, if you want. Look, he's sleeping; he doesn't even want it right now."
So I gave it to her and she took it and sucked on it and I went to the living room to find her toothbrush (don't ask). And when I came back Ed's nuk was sitting on his lap and Lucy was standing there looking at him with tears streaming down her face.
Like, she wanted a nuk so very badly but thought it was more important that Eddie have one available, in case he should need it, than for her to keep it for herself. Maybe it wasn't completely selfless, but it felt like it was. I cried rivers.

I can't believe she's gone.

I just can't believe she's gone.

My Aunt Jan passed away very suddenly and very unexpectedly this weekend while she and Jean were canoeing in Wisconsin. She was 55 and in seemingly perfect health. The cause is as of yet undetermined, and my entire family and I are all still in shock. My grandmother has lost her daughter; my mother and uncle have lost their sister; my sisters and I have lost our aunt... and countless others have lost an amazing woman, musician and friend.

Jan was a reader at our wedding six years ago today. She hosted Lucy's baby shower. She was Jean's godmother, travel companion, and tennis- and piano-partner. She adored and doted on Lucy and Eddie. As the phone calls come in we are learning how many people's lives she touched. Please either pray or "send power" to my family during this excruciating time. And please give all your loved ones a giant hug and tell them how much they mean to you.

Band Name of the Day

I've been getting the Pioneer Press every morning for HOW long now? And I just discovered the section where they have the Band Name of the Day. They have a bunch of contributions from readers, generally "cute kid stories" or "hey, I noticed this" kind of thing, and at the very end they take some weird juxtaposition of words and call it the Band Name of the Day. It's usually something like "Hairy Coffee" or "Dancing Interns." I had no point there but I like the feature.

Only three notes from the AI finale tonight:
1. Best part of the night: when the real Clay Aiken came out during the Clay-Aiken-impersonator's song. The expression on the impersonator's face was that of someone who's just won the lotto. And Clay Aiken now looks EXACTLY like Paul McCartney circa 1962, only slightly less heterosexual. Making the impersonator the only one onstage who actually looked like Clay Aiken. It was a bizarre and wonderful moment.

2. I used to think Toni Braxton was super-talented and classy. Like a new Aretha Franklin or somebody. And then she shows up on AI, and she's all mumbling through her song, and wearing that trampy white dress, and grinding on my man Taylor! Toni, I thought you were better than that. I really did. And how weird is it that Taylor sang with Toni Braxton, given Carol's post earlier this week?!??! Like, if Toni and Taylor married, she'd be Toni Braxton-Hicks!! Wild!

3. Taylor Won! Taylor Won! Party time! Excellent! Woo hoo! Woo hoo!


Back to real life. Eddie scared me a little today by eating on one side at 8:30 AM, and then on the other side at 9:30 (breastfeeding nazis: I normally feed one side right after the other but I had to get Lucy out of her booster and entertained with her toys before I could finish). Okay, that wasn't the scary part. He then slept from 10:30 AM until 2:30 PM!! I actually called the doctor, and I knew it was silly, but I just needed to make sure Mr. Rip Van Winkle was all right. Especially with the weird engorgement issues (not mastitis, and all better now) I've been having. So the nurse who called back mentioned a growth spurt, and I said to myself, "Self? Your son's head does look a little bigger." So I whipped out the tape measure. His head grew THREE-QUARTERS OF AN INCH in two weeks. Ow! And really, he does look less pinheady.

So I'm putting Lu to bed tonight and Ed was already in his crib, and Lu said "Ni-night" to Jean and gave her a kiss good night, and then looked around the living room and said "Where Eddie?" And when I said "Well, Eddie already went to bed" she toddled over to his door and peeked in and whispered "Ni-night Eddie!" before heading into her own room. It never occurred to me that it would be important to her to say ni-night to all of her family members. She is so far ahead of me.

Speaking of which, did I mention this? She's counting to ten. I am not joking. I'm sure she doesn't know what the words mean, but she generally gets the sequence right. All right, she usually flips eight and nine. She's always liked nine better anyway.

My husband brings all the boys to the yard

Okay, it's like, 75 degrees and sunny right now. Way too beautyful to be bloggering! BUT I needed to update a little.

Joel was a ROCK STAR of a husband this morning. He let me mow the lawn so he could spend some time with the kids (and I could get some exercise!). He assembled Lulu's new toddler bed. Threw in some laundry. Did dishes. Finished the lawn (he doesn't like it when I do the hills). Let me shower. Want a husband like that? I could teach you, but I'd have to charge. ;)

Not to be outdone, I personally de-ssembled Lucy's crib, moved it into Ed's room and re-assembled it, solo. I know, I'm amazing. :) Both kids are napping and I have some stuff to do, but have a great day, ok?

Oh, some of my awesomest cousins have new blogs. I'll add links... sometime.

Dumpster Diving... or whatever the opposite of that is. A potato chip?

So last night it took a full hour and many crocodile-tears and some backup from my sister, but I managed to get both kids bathed AND all their finger- and toenails clipped. Phew. It's one of those that, once it's done, I feel SO much better... but getting it done is a large challenge.

This morning, some of our alley-neighbors pulled in a huge dumpster to clean out their rabbit-warren of a home. Here are some ensuing conversations.

Joel: Hey, did'ja see the dumpster back there? After dark, I'm totally tossing the toilet (that we'd pulled out of the basement in, oh, January and is STILL sitting in our yard) and the tire (that for some wild reason a maple tree had been allowed to grow through and it has taken Joel the entire 4.5 years we have lived here to remove from said tree) in there.

Me: Sweet!

Fast-forward to this morning. I return home from an errand and see the guys tossing stuff in the dumpster. And I say, well I may not have any makeup on but I'm still going to see how far my "feminine wiles" can get me! So I grab Lucy, hoist her up on my hip and saunter over to the guys.

Me: Hieee.

Guy #1 (who is the Hobbit version of Alley Joel): How's it going?

Me: Great! Say, I was just wondering, and you can totally say no, would you maybe have some extra room in this thing... I have an old toilet and tire, do you think maybe I could toss 'em in there?

Guy #1: Sure! We're never going to fill this thing up. Do you need me to carry the stuff for you?

Me (aside to self): Yess! I still got it!

Guy #2: Hey, thanks for asking. You know, lotsa people would probably have just thrown their stuff in there.

Me: Really? That's so rude!

Mom, you'll be delighted to hear that we have acquired a toddler bed (crib size) and mattress for Lucy, so she doesn't have to have a "big girl" bed just yet. I'm excited to make the switch because Ed is getting WAY too big for the bassinet-part of his pack-n-play.

Pix

if you click on a photo, it gets bigger.

Lindsay Lohan and me: soul mates?

Hello my darlings!
I'm sorry I've been slacking a bit. I am kind of gearing up to go back to work... by spending LESS time on the computer. Um, I know, that makes no sense. Took the kids to Como Zoo today with my sister. That place is just fantastic. Tons of cool animals, close to home and the price is right! Then we had a Taco Bell picnic in my yard afterward. It felt like summer: heavenly.

Hmm, not much to talk about I guess. I'll be missing "AI" tonight because I'm going to an info session about the nursing program at St. Kate's.

I did want to give a shout-out to the woman wearing denim-on-denim (gaah! Lindsay Lohan's pet peeve! And one of mine!) at Target yesterday, who had the unbelievable gall to get in the checkout line behind me and Jean and the two kids, and to comment on the fact that they had only one register open, and then, when they did open another register, to saunter over to that open register without even a courtesy "do you want to go first?" glance in our direction. Both Jean's and my jaws hit our respective shoes and I am pretty sure I said, loudly, "Who does that?!?"
Anyway, so the only question for her now is which hell (Fashion Hell or Raised-in-a-Barn Hell) gets first dibs.

Oh. And also: the other day on the Channel 4 news, some blonde field reporter said: "Police think the perpetrators would have went down this alley..." WHAT!??!?! How can a professional newscaster be allowed to speak like that?? Anyway, you should boycott Channel 4. I am.

Yeah! Mail's here! Best part of the day. Bring on the formula coupons and Pottery Barn catalogs!

Beauty and the daddy

So Lucy and I were reading a generic "Beauty and the Beast" book yesterday (generic, as in, non-Disney-sanctioned), and every time dark-haired Beauty appeared on a page, Lucy would point and say "Mommy!"

Flattered, I encouraged her. "Yup, Mommy is a beautiful princess!" I said. When we came to the end and the blond prince appeared, she pointed again and said "Daddy!"

"Yes! That looks like Daddy!"

So last night I was getting Lu ready for bed while "America's Next Top Model" was on (I wasn't watching it, of course, it was just on. See, there's a difference). The models were lanking around, doin' their model-thing, and Lucy pointed again and said, "Mommy!"

Well, my goodness! She must have a very high opinion of her mother! And I must be really, really, ridiculously good-looking! Hurrah!

Okay, so this morning, I was holding Lu on my lap while I looked up a couple things online. Alas, she said "Daddy" while pointing to photos of, in turn, Kyle Lohse and Adam Rosenbaum. Neither of whom are at all bad-looking, but also neither of whom look particularly like Joel. So probably, any grownup female is "Mom" and any grownup man is "Dad." Rats.

I want the spoon.

I'm here! Despite reports to the contrary, I have not fallen right off the face of the Earth. Which is a funny phrase. Because if you're standing next to someone, and they fall off the Earth, you would stand there and watch as they were forcefully ejected off into the sky. See? Now isn't that weird?

Eddie Money had his 2-month checkup today. He is gynormous. 15 pounds and 25.5 inches long, which are the 98th and 99th percentiles, respectively. So we get those numbers and then the doctor saunters in and says, "Sooo, how is he eating?" And I was, like, are you kidding? Oh, but just in case you were starting to gaze woefully at your own underachieving, normal-sized child's body, get this: Eddie has a pin-head. His head-measurement percentile? 17th. Yowsa. So basically, though 98% of other 2-month-old boys' bodies are smaller than Eddie's, 83% of them have larger heads. How embarrassing.

Word, so I owe you an AI recap. I'm working on it! Hang tight there, dawg, and I'll work it on out for ya. It's all love. Or something.

Oh, right, the title: "I want the spoon." That, my friends, was Lucy's first full sentence (we think). I mean, she's been saying "Where Eddie?" and "Hey, poo-poo!" but that was the first full, diagrammable, subject-verb-predicate-or-whatever, sentence. It sprang from her little lips Monday evening at the end of a delish meal of BBQ ribs, just as I was about to tear off for dance class. My parents, aunt and grandmother were all beside themselves that they got to witness it. Never mind that it was technically a fork!

Hang on Sloopy

Okay, I know I've been a bad, bad blogger... the most effort I've made in the last few weeks has been toward my American Idol reviews, and even those have been eroding a little. Or that could be because there is one fewer singer every week. Hmm.

My parents have been in town this weekend, and man has it been nice to bust out of the usual routine a bit. This morning I got to play tennis with my mom, aunt and sister -- and Jean and I also got to play some coed softball in the afternoon.

Eddie's been an angel for the grandparents, totally putting up with me coming and going. I've had to pump a couple times when my "activities" didn't quite mesh with feeding-times, and he's been taking the bottle like a champ. What a guy.

Lucy is, simply, hilarious. Just a joy to behold. I adore her.

So the bummer-news this week is that our beloved Neighborinos, the Watsons, will be moving. They're buying a house actually not too far from Jean. We all knew we wouldn't all be staying in the 'hood forever, but it is still a very sad prospect for us Gronaus. We will miss them something awful.

The fabu-news this week is that our friends Becky and Adam had their baby girl! Vivian Jade was born on May 4 and we can't wait to meet her! Congratulations!!

So I'm sitting in bed, typing and enjoying the breeze coming through the window, and the lovely solitude and quiet, and then I stop and go: "quiet?! Something's wrong." Nothing was wrong, except that I'd forgotten to turn on the "parent unit" of the baby monitor. It was only 20 minutes, and I'm sure the Buckets is fine down there.

So we are trying to sell our bassinet. Know anyone who needs one? Eddie has outgrown it (and he is on the brink of outgrowing the bassinet-part of his pack-n-play too, holy cats!). We were asking $30 but I would take any offer at all at this point -- just want to get rid of the sucker.

Hmm, what else can I say? That just might do it for now. Happy Monday!

Dorky McDorkergirl, the least-talented paparrazza on the planet.

Lindsay Lohan, in the center, facing front. She has red hair. Okay, wait, the next one is better.

John C. Reilly, Virginia Madsen and Kevin Kline. These you should be able to pick out. Oh!! John C. Reilly TOTALLY waved at me. It helped that I was wearing an enormous yellow anorak, standing on a step, waving like a dang freak show and hollering "We love you Mr. Cellophane!"

Just kidding about the hollering part.

Oops, I tried to put a caption on this one but I am not that good. The dark-haired woman in the back (facing away from me) is Lily Tomlin; the blond wearing glasses (or just with a thick dark unibrow, it's hard to tell from here) is Meryl Streep.

This is a tulip from our yard. Yes, OUR yard, home of the Happiest Dandelions on the Planet, A.K.A. "Grass Alcatraz." I can't believe I actually took a picture of a friggin flower. Anyhoo, it's pretty, isn't it?

American Idol, 5/2

I apologize. I wanted to do something super-extra clever this week... but I'm coming up short of ideas and time. Time mostly. You understand, no?

Oh, and also we only took notes for the first song; Lucy and Eddie were taking up all our attentions during the second half of the show. So my second-half notes are going to be 100% by my memory of last evening. Which is now 17 hours old. And not good.

Elliott
"On Broadway" -- Awesome! Loved it. It was like he finally let go and just sang the heck out of it.

"Home" (Michael Buble) -- Ooh, wee, Elliott, that was so boring!

Paris
"Kiss" (Prince) -- At the time she was singing this, I thought the theme was "songs from the year you were born" and I was appalled that Paris is so young that she was born the year "Kiss" was a hit. But then it was brought to my attention that I probably only remembered this song from the movie "Pretty Woman" which came out after the song. But then it was brought to my attention that Paris is only 16ish and was born in 1990... No wait, can that POSSIBLY be right?? Holy crud, it is. Okay, I am old. Anyway, with all that going on, who even knows how she sang? I think it was actually pretty good.

"Be Without You" (Mary J. Blige) -- I sooo can't get into whatever genre of music this song is.

Chris
"Renegade" (Styx)
"I Dare You" (Shinedown)
Jean thought his voice sounded really good (which sounds like a tepid compliment but she said it very enthusiastically, I promise), and I thought Chris kicked ass. Joel said he thought it was pitchy and that I could put that in my back pocket and smoke it.

Katharine
"Against All Odds" (Phil Collins)
"Black Horse in a Cherry Tree" (KT Turnstall)
You ever know someone who is especially lovely, but so much so that people comment on how beautiful she is, like, ALL THE TIME? And like, sure, she is ridiculously good-looking, but maybe not, because you've heard it so many times and are tired of hearing it, because ain't nobody saying that kind of stuff about you, you're pretty sure? But then she opens her mouth, and she's just so dang nice, too... kind of makes you think maybe she has some hideous foot-fungus or something, because the universe must have some kind of balance? That's Katharine. I'm just glad I don't have to hang around with her in real life.

Taylor
"Play That Funky Music" (Wild Cherry)
Jean and I Just. Love. Him. Have I mentioned that before? Because we do. Love him.

"Something" (the Bea'les)
Ooh, wee, Taylor, hate to say it, but that was boring!


And one side note: there must be a product invented that allows one-armed people to do things, such as scrape out the inside of a sour-cream container. What is it? And why is it not marketed to new mothers? And where can I get one??

P.S. Congrats to my baby sister Ellen who is moving into her new apartment in Wrigleyville/Lakeview today. Let's all of us old/married/parents live vicariously through her!

"Look at this place... call it a mess" (actual song lyric on the radio right now!)

Random happenings from the fort:

In our alley, we have, arguably, the largest parking space on our block. We happily and readily let our friends park there for snow emergencies, or when they're constructing new garages, etc. Apparently the space's loveliness has attracted the attention of others, as well -- some neighbors we've never spoken to just asked if they could leave a car there for an hour. Which is totally fine. I am delighted to share our abundance of concrete with the teeming masses. Except they parked their little Nissan right in front of the garage door. And, like, I'm not going anywhere in the next hour, but cripes, there is room for approximately four cars on our slab, three of which could park without blocking our garage access. People. Use your brains.

I accidentally clocked Lucy in the eyeball with my elbow this morning. No harm done, but it came about three minutes after a little lesson about "not hitting people. Ever." Oops.

Eddie is such a funny little monkey. He's worked himself into a great little schedule -- a morning nap (or two!)... a little afternoon wakey time, another little nap, some evening wakey and then out like a light between 8 and 10 AM. Sleeps until 2, 3, or 4 AM(depending on the lateness of the last evening feeding)... then sleeps until about 8 (with another feeding at 6 or 7 AM). He's a champion feeder. Never really goes more than 10 minutes on one side, then happily takes the second for another 10. We are so, so lucky to have such an easygoing little guy. And he's smiling lots these days, and yesterday he cried "real tears". We were so entertained by his crying yesterday (eyes darting around quietly, followed by a lower-lip tremble and then a big "WAAAA!") that we forgot that it probably meant he needed something. He's got his 2-month (two months, I can't even believe it!!) checkup next week -- I'll post more after that.

Lucy's new fun thing is splashing in the toilet water. Gross, gross, gross. At least it was cleaned on Monday.

We're on a new "eating-healthy" kick. I'm busting out all my old issues of "Cooking Light" and we've found a couple SUPER tasty salads, of all things. But my real weakness is desserts. Cookies, ice cream, jelly-on-graham-crackers: you name it, if it's sugary goodness, I am all over it. Oh, and it doesn't help when I take a "light" recipe and go "well, it says fat-free sour cream but all I have is full-fat... I'm sure it's fine!" Drat. So I'll be trying a little harder.

Oh my gosh they just moved their turquoise 1982 conversion van onto our slab too. What must!

My Funny Eddiegus

Some funny photos of Eddie. Sorry I've been out of touch; I don't get internet access at home when it's raining.

Really.

AI 4/25

I have seen the dark side, my friends, and it is “Love Song Night” on Idol.

Ouch.

I think I miss Ace more than I thought I would. He would often surprise me by being better than I expected… and he was so dang cute. I have mini-crushes on Taylor and Chris, of course, but Ace was like my little brother. Or wait, more like Lew Ford, my Twins boyfriend. I’m sorry I can’t seem to distinguish between a brother and a boyfriend. That’s definitely a little weird. I should probably go in for some counseling. Um… I should probably point out that I don’t have any actual real-life brothers. Nor boyfriends. So that’s good.

Right, so Andrea Bocelli Night. I don’t know, I think Andrea Bocelli is more a product of excellent marketing, than The Most Fabulous Singer in The History of The World. Like, Pavarotti and Carreras and Bobby McFerrin probably have more talent… and what’s with his loony producer guy? I hate him.

But NOT as much as I hated the performances this week. We really reached new heights of suckitude. Or lows, I guess. Mercifully, this will be short., with very little focus on the singing, which was for the most part lackluster at best.

Katharine -- Jean, Joel and I thought she was amazing, fantastic, and a great start to the evening. She even looked like a younger, more beautiful, much-less-creepy Sarah Brightman. Unfortunately, the judges were like a wet blanket. It must have been dreadful live.

Elliott -- Elliott looks like the bizarro-world version of Ryan Seacrest. Like, if you took Ryan Seacrest and punched him many, many times in the head, and dumped him on a desert isle without toothpaste, heel-lifts or a flat-iron, you would wind up with Elliott. Or if you didn’t like that analogy, perhaps you can think of Elliott as the hobbit version of Seacrest. Hobbits are short, curly-haired, pointy-eared and unreasonably chipper, just like our little Elliott. Elliottawhile Yamgee, that would be his hobbit name. Trixies hobbitses!

Kellie -- We decided Kellie sounded like a cassette tape that’s been played about 400 times too many, not unlike my copied version of Billy Joel’s “Storm Front” album, to the point where even though I’ve had the album on CD now for about 10 years, I can’t hear the opening bars of “State of Grace” without thinking they sound a little warped. We got a kick out of Simon’s pronunciation of “warmth”: “whoompf.” It reminded us of better times, and Julie Andrews.

Paris -- Just kind of thought that she was trying to make the song (“The Way We Were“) “bigger” than it actually is. And her looks were sort of channeling Oprah. And WHAT was with the weird breath delivery of that last note? Yaarrgh!

Taylor -- Ouch, man. Joel gave him the heave-ho with the Gronau-patented “yerrrr-out!” sign (ask Joel to show it to you sometime, hey?). And even I’m afraid that performance will be enough to get the Silverback booted.

Galway Dave -- Did you guys catch how they mis-edited the comments of Andrea Bocelli’s producer-guy? He said something like “If [Galway Dave] does a great job, the song will be great for him…” (you know, the usual cloyingly optimistic remarks they give everyone)… except then they cut the sound, but the video played like 1/2 second longer, enough to show him saying, quite obviously, “BUT...” before the video, too, cut away. We are dying to know what he said!

Anyway, a simply horrible night for everyone. Not even to mention all the technical difficulties (judges’ and Ryan’s mikes were on when they should have been off, and vice versa). Let’s just try to forget this ever happened, okay?

In a good spot

Want to know why I’m so happy?

I got both kids to nap at the same time, two days running! I’m a freeking genius!

Just kidding.

I’m happy because my life still has so much possibility. Sure, I’m “old and married” and “settled down” but there is still time for me to dream. I can page through magazines with photos of enormous, beautifully-decorated homes, and I can still think “maybe, someday.” I’ve got a couple kids, and we might be done, but… we might not. We might have five! I have a decent job, but heck, maybe I’ll go back to school and become something else.

It might just be the time of year, because a two-week streak of gorgeous spring days sure lends itself to boundless optimism. But today, I’m happy.

Oh, and I haven't dropped either kid on his nor her head in over a week!

What just happened?

So it's Monday, after a pretty crazy weekend. Thursday, we drove up to St. Cloud to see JG's grandmother in the subacute care facility. Then we made the trek back through the cities, down to Illinois for the rest of the weekend.

Here's a shout-out to the Ryans we saw (and those we missed) at Nana's party. Hey!

Miraculously, we also managed to hook up with many of our friends (specifically, Nick & Estelle and Julie & Stu) in Chicagoland. Peg & John came all the way from Milwaukeeland on Saturday night (when they had a wedding cake to bake for the next day!) to hang out with us. It was wonderful to see everyone.

On the way back home Sunday, unexpectedly and unbeknownst to us, we bought a pop-up camper. We'd been talking about that possibility (so we have "a room of our own" up at the G's lake), and Joel's p's found us a great deal and, as Joel said, "pulled the trigger" for us. So we are the proud owners of a used camper (or we will be, once we reimburse the Gronaus)! Hooray! We've been excitedly making lists (towels. bug spray. pillows. decks of cards.) ever since.

Ooh, sorry this is short -- I just realized both kids are sleeping and I had better shower if I don't want to miss the opportunity entirely.

Psycho Sleeper

Okay, so the top "artist's rendering" is how I put Lucy down to bed in her crib last night at 7:30. The "B"s are her three blankets. The bottom one is how I found her, a mere 15 minutes later, fast asleep. Those are her socks in her left hand.

And we're considering putting her in a big-girl bed??

A.I. 4/8 Review

Well I for one am greatly relieved that this was Great American Songbook Night and not Rod Stewart Night. I mean, sure, I want his body, AND I think he’s sexy, but … well … on the other hand, maybe America is due for a remake of “This Old Heart of Mine.”

Joel (JG): “Rod Stewart singing American Classics? That’s f#$%ing stupid.”

Jean (JT): “Why is Seabreeze wearing two microphones?”

Meg: “Paula is even more orange tonight! And it’s rubbing off on Simon! Is jaundice contagious?”

Consensus: Rod Stewart’s baby is stinkin’ adorable.

Chris “Galway Dave” Daughtry
M: “That was awesome! Wasn’t it great?”
JT: “His tie is inside his shirt.”
M: “Maybe that’s a cravat? He has such lovely eyebrows. And I adore the swishy sideburns.”
Carol (via teleconference): “I thought Chris was the guy playing the guitar!”
M: “Me too!”
JT: “Yeah, I did at first too.”
Carol: “Yeah, but it took me ¾ of the song to figure it out. I was like, ‘What did they do to him this week?’”
M: “Wasn’t the guitar guy black?”
Carol: “Yes!”

Paris Ramada:
JT: “How did her hair get so long? I like her simple look this week. It‘s all about their singing tonight.”
M: “Sometimes she sings like there’s a marshmallow in her throat. But I thought she was awesome!”

Taylor Hicks:
No, no, no, Taylor, you have it all backward. You. Send. US.

Elliott Phone Home:
JT: “I really like his voice. He’s singing it pretty straight up (until the end).”
M: “He’s such a goofy-looking guy. But man, that was good. He’s great.”
JT: “I don’t think that jacket is ‘him’.”
M: “I have to agree with Simon -- he’s missing something.”

Kellie Pickles:
M: “Whoa, there, make sure you get up to that note! Okay, I’m going to blame that on the satellite transmission.”
JT: “A titch flat.”
(and later)
JT: “Oh, dear. That was bad, man.”
M: “And it started off so good! Oh, poor sweetie. Oh, honey.”
We especially liked Rod Stewart’s stunned silence after Kellie said “Well, you took a load off my chest!”

Ace Ventura:
M (to herself): “Wow, he looks like Derek Jeter. I’m not going to say that, though, because that would sound stupid.”
JG: “He looks like Derek Jeter!”
M: “Aaaarrrgggh!”
JT: “Omigod, he cut his hair.”
M: “Nooo, it’s a ponytail. No, wait, it’s a bun.’
JT: “It’s not a bun, it’s just curled under.”
JG: “I’m a little envious of his hairline.”
JT: “I could not look more like this guy.”
(Separated at birth?)








JG: “Nice falsetto. Ohh, lip quiver!”
M: “Shut UP, Paula!“
JG: “Now she’s got a coin slot.”
JT: “Yeah, but hers is in front.”
M: “And I think it also accepts dollar bills.”

Katharine:
M (distracted, trying to find a photo of Ace that best displays his resemblance to Jean): “That was really good.”
JT: “She’s got great vocals.”
JG (who only came in during Ace’s song) : “She was the best all night.”

Bottom three: This is tough, dawg -- almost everybody totally kicked it tonight. In a good way. Well, except Kellie, for sure, I guess; then maybe Paris and Elliott. Or wait, Ace instead of Paris.
Kellie’s got to go.

Friggin kidding me

The last couple days have been a constant stream of adding insult to injury. Argh.
So this evening I hear a loud crash come from the bathroom. Joel left the toilet seat up (as he does when he's really stressed out and/or tired) and my entire bag of makeup (left open because when I even GET to put makeup on these days it has to be fast) fell into the toilet water.

So, the question: do I now really have to buy All New Makeup?

John G update

Joel's dad is going home from the hospital today. He did have a heart attack. His one artery was 100% blocked; apparently his arteries are organized differently from most people's and it's only because of that that he is still with us. They put a stent in and did a bunch of tests and though he will have to make some serious lifestyle changes to prevent this from happening again, it sounds like he's going to be okay.

Thanks everyone for the kind thoughts, words, prayers and "power."

Joel's grandma, well, we're not sure what's going on with her. Usually our updates on her come through John, and obviously he hasn't been able to get the info. I think she's still in the hospital in St. Cloud.

Was there anything else? Oh! My grandmother is moved into her new place in Richfield. SHE HAS CABLE!!

Happy Easter

If you're the praying sort, please keep Joel's family in your prayers. His father had a heart attack Thursday night, and he has had at least one more since then. He's in the hospital now and we are probably going over there soon.

Also, Joel's grandmother had a fall on Tuesday and is also in the hospital.

Also, Joel's aunt had a healthy baby girl (Gabrielle or Gabriella?) earlier this week. Congrats to Doris and Scott and big sisters Megan, Paige and Maddie!

I hope everyone has a less stressful weekend than I am planning on having.

AI 4/11/06 -- Top 8

This was an interesting week. I mean, Queen? I kind of like Queen, and all, but I'm not really sure anyone but Freddie Mercury should be singing their songs. Speaking of which, he was mysteriously absent from the proceedings tonight. Hmmm.

This week we have group-reviews, kind of like your own personal Randy/Paula/Simon, except much less repetetive and stupid. If I do say so myself.

Ray is my dad; Jean is my sister. I believe you are acquainted with Meg and Joel.

Bucky
Ray: That was tedious, monotonous and wasn't my cup of tea. (Ray was actually drinking a cup of tea at the time, so he speaks from experience.)
Jean: Some parts were not on key.
Meg: I agreed with Jean, but I thought the performance was okay. Why is Paula so orange?
Joel: Boring If he could have changed up, or increased the tempo, then it would have been his, dawg.

Ace -- "We Will Rock You"
Ray: I agree with Simon --it should only be sung by Queen. And I think Ryan Seacrest is getting shorter each week!
Jean: Why is he stomping through the whole number?
Meg: This is not even a song! His pants needed to be way tighter. Besides, someone that pretty isn't going to rock anything. Also, I'm surprised during the line "blood on your face" that he didn't touch his face. He's usually so all over the built-in choreography.
Joel: This is a tough song to make your own.

Kellie -- "Bohemian Rhapsody"
Ray: This was the best Pickler's ever done.
Jean: It was great!
Meg: I don't believe I'm saying this, but I really, really liked it.
Joel: Quite honestly, it was the best of the first three. She rocked it!

Chris "Galway Dave" -- "Innuendo"
Ray: I like this guy, Chris, but it just got kind of repetetive.
Jean: I thought he sang it well, but the song was boring.
Meg: Ellen should have married him when she had the chance!! I totally loved it, eyeliner and all.
Joel: He did a great job, but it's not that good of a song.

Katharine -- "There's No Time For Us"
Ray: Boy, she is just beautiful.
Jean: Overall, I liked it; some parts were off.
Meg: Her voice wasn't quite good enough for the song, but it was still really good.
Joel: I'm changing Lucy's diaper! What's happening?

Elliott -- "Somebody To Love"
Ray: Good performance. Dumb song. (Aside: My dad likes music from the '50s. REAL rock-n-roll, like Buddy Holly, The Kingston Trio, etc.)
Jean: Good voice. I like that he has more hair this week. Like, they maybe shaved his leg hair and pasted it on top of his head. It's nice.
Meg: Okay, I think maybe Paula is eating too many carrots. That can turn you orange, right? Or WAIT! Maybe she's jaundiced! Pull out the billi lights!
Joel: I'm brushing Lucy's teeth! What's happening?

Trevor -- "Crazy Little Thing Called Love"
Ray: This is a Queen song? I actually like it!
Jean: Hilarious. I love him. I'm going to ask him to be my date for the next wedding I go to!
Meg: (After Trevor's failed attempts at kicking over the microphone stand) And... this is why I love him.
Joel: Dude, it's all corn. ("But!" we protested, "It's supposed to be corny!") No, I'm saying it's still on the cob. It's canned corn. He's trying to be goofy, but that's not his original deal. He'll get through, though, because America is stupid.

Paris -- "The Show Must Go On"
Ray: Dial carefully; those are 866 numbers, not 800 numbers.

No, wait, that's Ryan Seabreeze's comment. What did my dad say?!? I have no idea.

Jean: Why does she have the Budweiser symbol on her hip?
Meg: She could not be any more short-waisted. Her waist is 3 inches below her armpits.
Joel: Did she just do the "muscle man"? That has to go.


Summary: Bottom three are Bucky, Ace and Paris.

What Did The Nuk Ever Do To You?

...except try its little Nuk-hardest to make you happy??

Ed hates his Nuk. Like, really really hates it. About 65% of the time. The other 35%, it soothes him like a good Nuk should. I just don't get it.

Ed is kind of a weird kid. Sometimes he just doesn't want to be held. Unheard-of! So we put him down, he's happy, and the world keeps turning. And, like, he's never been what I would call "colicky," but every once in a while he just has these screaming fits. Doesn't want to be held, doesn't want his swing, couldn't be hungry, diaper is clean... who knows?


Ground Beef 101

OR

Joel is Funny, Part XII

OR

One of my favorite parts of being married is still finding out new things about each other, even six years later.

So... I occasionally cook things with ground beef, right? And one of my pet peeves is when I don't manage to chop up the beef finely enough as I'm cooking it. I think cooked ground beef ought to be of a nice, even, small consistency, first of all so it picks up all the sauce or whatever I'm doing with it, and more importantly so that I don't end up with gynormous chunks of MEAT that are unevenly cooked or at the very least gross out my palate.

So I mention this to Joel one day (after apologizing for not chopping up the pieces quite to my satismafaction)... and he looks at me, kind of dumbfounded.

"Meggo," he says, "That's how groundbeef is supposed to be."

"WHAT?!" I stammer. "No!" I proceed to outline the aforementioned reasons for chopping up the beef thoroughly.

"Yeah," he replies, "Well, that's why whenever you cook, I'm like, Where is all the meat?"

You guessed it: this is crying out for another poll. Here goes:

How ought ground beef be cooked?
	Chopped up nice and fine and evenly. Each bite should be homogenous with regard to size, taste and texture.
	Barely chopped at all. Bring on the massive chunks of undercooked meat with absolutely no seasoning in the middle!
Free polls from Pollhost.com

Photos, yeah photos

More kid photos.

Jan and Great-grandma and I took the kids to the zoo yesterday.

And hello, what a beautiful week we're having. I know it's going to rain eventually, but MAN is it lovely!

Joel is funny, Part XI

So JG and I are driving home from Mandy's wedding on Sunday morning. And the big story in the paper over the weekend was that "Gospel of Judas" they found in Egypt, right? Now, JG and I were both raised Catholic, and we both read The DaVinci Code, so we get a little interested in this sort of thing. So we're talking about the Judas thing a little. And the conversation moves to The DaVinci Code.

"It's like that thing from the DaVinci Code," I say.

"Yeah," Joel answers. "That's right. But the point of The DaVinci Code was that Jesus was a woman."



<<<>>>



Um... WHAT?


Anyway, CONGRATULATIONS to Mandy and her new husband Shawn. The wedding was just lovely, the weather could not have been more perfect, and as a little bonus, Ed was an angel all weekend. Oh! Pictures! Let me see what I can do here...

'Fess Up.

Okay, I HAVE to know: who are you two people who answered "No" to the poll below? Because I have my guesses. :)

Okay, fine, twist my arm, I'll tell you: I think one is my mom, and I think the other is Peg. I'm less certain about Peg. :)

Well?!?!

A.I. April 4

Okay, there's laundry to put away, a kitchen floor in grave need of sweeping, a Target trip of which to hide evidence ("Another $75 at Target!??! Damn identity thieves!"), and while one baby is sleeping, the other teeters precariously on the edge of waking up...

But am I accomplishing these tasks? NO! I am blogging! Because you COUNT on me! Because it is my DUTY! My DUTY, dammit!

I was going to post my American Idol reviews, but first I must obtain a promise from Ellen that she will read no farther (because, El, YOUR reviews are coming in the mail and I want you to read them then. Do you think you can manage, El? Do ya?). Okay, then, here goes.

Taylor: Taylor, your violinist looks like a homeless man. Also, I am afraid this song is WAY too high for you. I love you, you weird old man, but tonight you are not good. Bottom Three!

Mandisa: Dear LORD this is going to be a long night. At the risk of sounding like Simon (and is that really a bad thing?), this is a very dreadful karaoke rendition of this song. Oi. And are you actually running out of breath?? Heavens! Make it stop! Bottom Three!

Elliott: Now, you can hardly go wrong with Garth Brooks. I am not sure what's with that shoulder-dip-dance, but this was prolly my favorite performance of the night.

Paris: Pretty good! And you are so cute.

Ace: What are we going to do with you, Ace? You and all your brothers are just too pretty for your own good. If you aren't careful you will be subject to terrorist attack, not unlike the Baldwin brothers in that one South Park episode.

Quick aside: how bad is it to tape the nuk to your baby's mouth? Like, if you know it will make him happy? And if you use that nice, low-tack blue painting tape?

Right.

Oh, and back to Ace: I am fairly certain that he and I have the exact same hairdo. Which does not bode well for either one of us.

Oh, and Ace, you were boring.

Kellie: Two breasts does not a performance make! I would like to see more performing; I don't think she can skate by on looks and nice singing for much longer. Bottom Three!

Bucky: I know I watched his performance... I can't remember a dang thing other than he was wearing a cowboy hat. Isn't country supposed to be his "thang"??

Chris ("Galway Dave"): Pretty good. Unfortunately, also pretty boring. (At this point in the show I was distracted by Lucy's bedtime, though, so that may be part of my problem.)

Katharine: I think she was actually pretty good ... but I couldn't figger out what on EARTH that song was about. You're bringing out the empress in me? You barely get near Everest with me? Or is it one of those spelling songs, like B-I-N-G-O?

And seriously, was that actually Kenny Rogers or was that the MAD-TV guy impersonating him? Whoever it was, was frightening.

Random Tuesday Stuff

It's Opening Day! Go Twins!

Last night was the first night of my new swing and latin dance classes. They were very, very fun -- my students seem pretty cool and pretty untalented, which is just how I like 'em. And Joel survived (mostly) the 2.5 hours home alone with the kids.

Look for my American Idol recap tomorrow! Looks like it's Country Night tonight. Oh, Lordy, I'm not sure how that bodes for Chris "Galway Dave" Daughtry. Or any of them, if I'm being honest. I seem to remember previous years' Country Nights being near-total nightmares. Feel free to share your thoughts in the Comments!

Oh, can you send some "power" our way? Lucy fell off a chair (upon which she was standing, unfortunately -- I was trying to help her wash her hands!) and bonked her head on the kitchen floor this morning. I get into the swing of things and start thinking either A) my kids are indestructible and/or B) Lucy's a bigger (and more coordinated) girl than she really is and this is dangerous. I think she is okay but I feel so, so terrible.

Oh, and if you need a photographer for your kids or your family or whatever, please check out my Neighborino Pat's work. He is just awesome with little kids (and probably bigger kids too) and he is extremely talented.

Another FYI: I am sure none of you are trying to email me at my work email address, right? BECAUSE I AM ON LEAVE UNTIL MAY 30. So if you are writing me at an address that ends "libertysite.com" or "altafimarketing.com" or "harlandics.net" please don't. Because I can't read it. :)

Does it count?

Okay, so Eddie may or may not have rolled over yesterday. I know, I know, he's not even four weeks old! You say, and you are justified. Also, I didn't exactly witness it, and if Mom didn't see it, did it really happen? But here's the sitch:

I was taking a shower. No, wait, I had run downstairs to do a quick 20-minute video workout. I can't remember. Anyway, I walk back into the living room to see Ed on his side on the floor and Joel and Lucy kind of hovering over him. Next thing we know, he's on his back. So... okay, that is not "rolling over" but: Joel says he started on his front. Not exactly on his tummy, but kind of bunched up on his hands and knees.

It was definitely an accident, but the truth remains that Ed started on his front and wound up on his back. You make the call: is it a roll-over? My pen stands poised over the baby book.

Did Ed or did Ed not roll over?
	Did.
	Did not.
	You are a loon. Are you sure this is not your first baby?
Free polls from Pollhost.com

Oh! CONGRATULATIONS are in order to my coworkers Lisa and Kelly on their respective baby boys born over the weekend! I hope everyone is doing well, I have only the sketchiest of details. Best wishes to both gals and their husbands and the new men in their lives!

Naps are for sissies

Just kidding. I do enjoy a good nap now and again. I could have napped today (both kids slept simultaneously for once!)... I didn't. A missed opportunity. Instead, I looked at houses online and listened to the Twins' penultimate spring training game. Kinda boring.

I am obsessed with dessert. Like, it's all I want to eat, ever. Like, I know I should try to exhibit some self-control, especially when I have a bridesmaid dress to cram myself into in eight days... but dessert is just so darn yummy.

The kids and I took a lovely walk today, over to Dee's house. (I needed her to sign some tax forms.) It was fun to chat with Dee, and Lucy got to see all her little buddies again. And the walk was very nice -- I broke a little sweat pushing that double stroller, and the rain held off until we got home.

Ed's birth announcement is in the Monticello Times: http://monticellotimes.com/main.asp?SectionID=36&SubSectionID=102&ArticleID=13155&TM=56112.3
Apparently Joel's grandparents (Wilbur and Luci) have moved to Florida. I can't believe they didn't tell anyone! :)

CONGRATULATIONS to Jill (an old college roomie) and Brent on the birth of Alex Michael! Alex was born on Tuesday and was 7 lbs. 8 oz., 20" long. Mom and baby are doing fine. Welcome to the world, Alex... and welcome to parenthood Brent and Jilly.

Buckets of love

Gronau Out!











Okay, fine, Donny and Marie, they're not.

Congrats Bree!

CONGRATULATIONS to my cousin Bridget (and her husband Dan and their daughter Megan) on the birth of their new baby boy, Ryan Philip!

Unfortunately I have no other details, i.e. date, size, or how anything went other than everyone looks like they're doing great from the pictures. But CONGRATS no less!

I should really get Lu up from her nap, but I'm sooo enjoying the quiet (Ed passed out on my lap after his latest feeding... he "Moro reflex"-es every few minutes, whacking his hand on the TV tray I have my computer balanced on, but not waking up. Cute).

So Ed is kind of a weird kid. By Lucy standards, anyway, which are of course the only standards I have to go by. Last night it was bedtime but Ed was fussing. So the three of us tucked into our bed and tried to sssh him to sleep (with the help of a pacifier as well as out pinkie fingers to suck on). No luck, and JG and I were gearing up for a loooong and dreadful night, when we decided just to put him in his bassinet to see what happened. Unbelievably, he was out like a light. I had to wake him up for his feedings all night. Amazing. Apparently he just wanted to be left alone. Our little, somewhat-more-masculine Marlene Dietrich.

Anyway, during the day he is completely unpredictable with his naps and feedings. BUT! Good news, his bilirubin is decreasing, meaning the jaundice is indeed abating. In fact, he's even starting to look a little less "swarthy".

REALLY have to go wake up Lu.

Gah!

Please email me if you want me to send you some photos -- just send me an email with "photos please" as the subject and nothing in the body copy (I'll just send a mass email then). Blogger is KILLING me, I can't upload a single one. Dang it all straight to heck.

Okay! Time for an update! Had Ed in for his 2-week checkup today (one day early).

A) I need a new clinic; we spent over an hour waiting for the nurse, and then the doc. And we had a 9:30 AM appointment!

B) Ed is terrific. He's up to 10 lbs (they want kids to regain their birth weight by 2 weeks, so obvoiusly he has managed that and then-some). He grew 3/4" in length too, and his head is up almost 1" as well.

C) Except... the doc was concerned that he looked a little jaundiced, so then we had to take him to the hospital lab for a blood test. Poor little guy. And poor Lucy, who prolly didn't know WHAT was happening, though I'm sure she was grateful that she wasn't the one getting poked and prodded. I maintain that he's not jaundiced at all -- he's just a little swarthy. Oh well. We wait for the doc to call with results.

D) Lu was such a trooper, sitting with us through the long waits, and the medical personnel torturing her brother, with neither a snack nor a diaper change to distract her. I swore I'd never be this kind of mother but... we went to McDonald's. *sigh* Another chink in my au-naturel, tree-huggin', granola-lovin' armor.

E) I'm so happy to be listening to the Twins spring training game on the radio. COME ON, SPRING!!!

Photos!

Drat. Blogger is breaking my heart. Coming soon.

Good time to call

Hi there. I know, you're DYING to call us at home, aren't you? But I bet you're afraid it's a bad time. Well, sometimes it isn't!

A Bad Time to call would be before 8 AM.
Also, 1-7:30 PM.
Also, after 9 PM.

Here, wait, let me make it easier: GOOD times to call are 8 AM - 1 PM. And 7:45-9 PM. There, did that help?
All times listed are Central Time.

Oops! I thought these were up already

Photos by Patrick Watson, www.ranterbanter.com

Chutzpah!

Hi.
Well, it's been a week -- 1 week and 2 days.
And 2 snowstorms...
And 2 visits from grandpa...
And 1 business trip for Joel...
And 8 loads of laundry...
And 93 email messages...
And 0 (zero!) crying fits for me!

When Lucy was born, I cried for, like, a week afterward. All happy tears. I suppose I probably cried myself out (frustrated tears) the last couple days before Ed was born.

It's hard knowing where to start writing, now that this chapter has begun. So much of what's happening is too mundane (Lucy's toys. Doing dishes. Squeaking in a shower.) and/or too personal (um, everything having to do with recovery from childbirth) to start trying to share. So, a couple points:

- Ed is a champion breastfeeder (and Joel's so proud, LOL).

- And, get this, he actually occasionally sleeps at night. Amazing.

- It's Day Five of Being Home on Leave and I am already very, very tired of the theme song from "Maya & Miguel." It haunts my dreams.

- Having a second kid is just as amazing as having one... if not more so. I look at Lucy and I can guess, kinda, how Eddie will grow. It makes all the feedings and diaper changes and soothing somehow worth it, knowing how quickly he'll be a "big kid."

Oy, I think they're all waking up. Better go. Oh! I'm sorry, super-quick Funny Joel story I have been telling a lot of people but it will be new to some of you:

So Joel's p's went to DC a couple weeks ago for Joel's mom's brother's official retirement from the Navy. (There was a big ceremony at the Pentagon, and the family toured DC for a few days.) Anyway, at the Holocaust memorial, they found out that the town of Gronau (in Germany) was originally (or at least, at one time) a large Yiddish settlement. "Who knew?" they said to themselves (and to us)... "We're Jewish!"
Joel is tickled to be Jewish, of course (he's quite ticklish), and he starts trying to incorporate Yiddish and/or Hebrew (I can't tell them apart, I'm sorry, I'M not the Jewish one) phrases into his repertoire. So he's talking about Lucy being such a character, and he wants to say that she has a lot of "chutzpah"... except he pronounces it:

wait for it...

"SHIT-spa."

Yup, ladies and gentlemen, let' s give it up for Joel Gronau, one night only, don't forget to tip your waiters and bartenders.

one-handed typing

working on getting more photos up -- there are more i promise!

1st day home with both kids (jg at work) was heaven, believe it or not.

had an awesome blizzard here this morning.

having heartburn (why on earth NOW?).

will try to write more tomorrow.

Hi everyone!

Greetings! We're home from the hospital. Ed is great -- nursing, filling his diapers and making us fuss over him like an old pro. Lucy is very intrigued with the new guy. We put a large book up by Ed's pack-n-play so Lu can stand on it and peek in. She's spent a good part of the last hour standing there, jabbering on her "phone" and gesturing wildly at him.

I had my first "welcome to the NFL" moment this afternoon. JG was napping in the basement and Lu was napping in her room, so I went to change Ed's diaper. I was trying to put the gel on his little circumcision and of course he peed everywhere (soaking his clothes, blanket, and changing pad), then pooped on the clean diaper, then started screaming... then Lucy started screaming... then the dryer buzzed. Argh!

Thanks again everyone for sticking with us during this WILD pregnancy. You know where to find us, but I am going to try to get back to everone to whom I owe phone calls/emails. Many beams of love going out to all of you.
Meg

Picture of Eddie (Gus)

Fat Daddy JG posting on Meg's behalf. More to come as Lucy and Eddie allow..

It's a Baby!!!

Edward Cornelius Gronau
March 7, 2006
8:08 AM
9 pounds 5 ounces, 22” long, 13 ½” head
Dark brown hair (but we’ve been fooled by that before!)

Monday: extreme frustration. After almost three weeks of false labor (regular but painless contractions), we called the hospital at 5:45 AM for our induction, only to be told that they were completely full; we should call back at 9:0 AM. I called Dr. Syal at the clinic at 8:30 -- she was going to try to get me in. She called back -- nothing yet; she’d call back by 10:30. 10:30 came and went, with no call -- I called the clinic twice and then the hospital trying to track down some info about whether or not I was ever going to have this kid! Joel, Lucy and I ran some errands and took Lu to her 18-month checkup. We finally got an update at 3:00: we’re first on the induction list… for Wednesday. Well, no way was I going to make it another 38 hours without giving birth. I thought about going to work on Tuesday, and I thought about “enjoying” another day at home.. and I cried. And cried. JG and I made plans to take Lu to day care in the morning and then catch lunch and a matinee movie.

Monday evening, Jean came over for dinner, bearing one of those roaster chickens from Cub and a Baker’s Square French Silk pie. We ate, and I beat Jean in Scrabble. Jean beat me in Canasta, we reciprocate that way. I went to bed, for the first time in three weeks, not even thinking about contractions.

3:30 AM Tuesday: I woke up with tummy troubles. Ooh, too much roaster chicken! I thought. The indigestion went away, but came back a few minutes later. The same thing happened three or four times, and I thought: hmmm, maybe these are contractions! Around 4:15, I elbowed Joel: “I think I might be having contractions.”
Joel: “Unggh, whuh? Oh, yeah, I had a dream about that. I’ll tell you in the morning.”

I got up around 5:00 and went to the bathroom, then sat on my birth ball in the dark kitchen and wrote down the contractions, which were now 4-5 minutes apart and getting quite painful. At 5:30 I woke up Joel (again), and said we might want to call someone to take care of Lucy. Joel sprang into action, calling Dee to warn her of an early drop-off; I called the hospital. St. John’s said they didn’t have any nurses for me, but that they’d call back. I jumped in the shower. When I got out, Joel had Lucy up and had info from St. John’s: we were headed to Woodwinds Hospital in Woodbury.

We dropped off Lu at Dee’s around 6:20 and hightailed it over to Woodwinds, arriving at 6:40. We put the Hypnobirthing CD on in the van and I had to concentrate to breathe through the contractions. They weren’t terribly painful, but I did have to really focus on relaxing each time. We got into room #264 immediately and they hooked me up to the monitors and checked my cervix -- a stretchy 5! Joel put the CD on in the room and they told me they would monitor me for 20 minutes and then I could get in the tub and/or on the birth-ball, if I wished. The monitoring went on longer than 20 minutes, though -- they eventually hooked up my IV (for the group-B-strep antibiotics) and I continued to breathe through the contractions, which were getting progressively stronger. I kept trying to consciously relax every muscle from my forehead on down to my bottom area, and I also kept telling myself, “it’s not pain, it’s just pressure“. It actually worked. Joel would stroke the back of my arm, or caress my back and forehead, during the surges. Oh! He wants me to tell you that he also pressed “play” at least three times on the CD player.

The doc arrived at 7:45 and the surges were getting very, very difficult to control. I had two kinda bad ones (it didn’t help that the doc was asking me Very Silly Questions, like “how are we doing?” and “do you feel like pushing?”), and my forehead was getting really sweaty, and I thought, you know what? This is very silly. I think I might just ask for an epidural, because this is SO much work and is this really worth it? And then the doc says “OK, we’re going to check you” and MUCH to my surprise, I was fully dilated! The only thing holding this baby back was a large blob of water, which the doc broke. I felt like then I made a conscious decision to start pushing, and while I tried the “birth breathing” it felt much easier to actually push. The doc and nurses were encouraging that anyway -- the doc kept asking me to hold my own legs, when I really thought it would be more productive for me to keep my arms relaxed and let Joel and the nurse hold my legs up for her. Regardless. I kind of half-pushed, half-breathed until I could really feel the head come out. I pushed again to get the shoulders out and really, the rest was easy (total, I pushed through about 4 surges or so?).

And at 8:08, our little Eddie was born! All 9lbs., 5 oz. and 22 inches of him. The doc handed him to me as Joel said “It’s a boy!” and I got to snuggle with him and kiss his dark little head while Joel cut the cord. I got some stitches (by far, the worst part of the whole thing!) and they weighed and measured the little guy. I nursed him about 40 minutes later, and he, amazingly, latched right on. Joel started making phone calls around 9:00.

So far we’ve had so many wonderful visitors: Joel’s p’s and sisters, My p’s, Jean, Jan and Lucy (who took one look at Ed and said “baby baby baby?”); Carol, Pat and Josie; Michelle and Nikki; Tricia; and Daycare Dee and Darrell. Ed’s doing great, and I am too (despite the bewildering fact that there’s no nursery here, so new moms don’t really get the best possible sleep at night). Joel and all the grandparents are beside themselves, of course. We just can’t believe, after all that, that he finally decided to come on his own. Fabulous. So happy.

Limbo

And I don't mean that fun, hilarious party game with the broomstick and the stupid song.

It took about seven phone calls (mostly me calling my clinic and the hospital to try to track down my doctor, who promised to call me back and still has not) to finally find out that St. John's is on "divert" status today (meaning they're not even accepting ambulances) and they'll put me back on the list...

for Wednesday.

I simply have No Idea what on earth I am going to do with myself for the next 33 hours. I'm seroiusly considering going to work tomorrow, if they'll even have me.

Oh, but I'm first on the list for Wednesday. Is that supposed to make me feel better?

It's hard out here for a preggo

Postponed.
I know what you're about to say: Are you kidding?

We dutifully called the hospital this morning at 5:45. "I'm sorry, we can't have you come in this morning. Call back at 9:00."

It's 8:13.

Lucy was up all night, crying, for no apparent reason. Nightmares? Tummy troubles? A couple good things (trying really, really hard to look on the bright side):
1. In the last two weeks, Lu has learned a couple key things. She'll now take something to the kitchen trash and throw it out for you, if you ask her to. She has also gotten pretty dang good at using a spoon to feed herself with. If I ever have this baby, those little things are going to be extremely helpful.
2. All our family is Officially Home from their various sojourns around the globe. Of course, I probably could have gone with them, had I any clue I would be charging straight at 42 weeks with no baby in sight. Seriously, though, I'm happy that everyone's back in town, and it sounds like they all had wonderful vacations.

8:20. If they can't get me in when I call at nine, I'm taking Lulu out on a few errands.