Life, ALTAFIED

So my company renamed itself ALTAFI (www.altafimarketing.com) and we had the big renaming launch yesterday -- the office was decked out in lime green, and they brought in subs and cake and there were some contests and whatnot. It was pretty fun actually. :) Anyway, the point of this is there was a happy hour after work yesterday at a local restaurant and when I got in my car at 5:30pm to drive home I peek at my cell phone and I see I have FOUR missed calls, which is a LOT, and one new message so I'm dialing in and I can't get the message to play and finally I do and it's Jean saying "Oh hey, someone got shot in your neighborhood just now." So I see that the other THREE messages are from Joel (who was just supposed to pick Lucy up at 4:45 and go home) so I start to freak out and I call home and the conversation went something like:
Me: "Omigod what's wrong??"
Joel: "Oh, I have SO much to tell you! Well Randy Moss got traded..."
Me: "WHAT!?!? I need these stories in DESCENDING order of importance, please. Now!!"
Joel: "Are you at home now?"
Me (forgetting that I had CALLED HIM at home): "You're not HOME!!? Where ARE you?!?!"
Joel: "Well got called into a meeting right at 4, and let me read you this letter..."
(long letter-reading ensues... phrases like "your position has been eliminated, we have a new opportunity for you... should you choose not to accept it, your employment will be terminated...)
Me: "OK, well that doesn't sound so bad. Now who got shot?"
Joel: "Oh, a Ramsey county police officer."
Me: "Like right by our house?? Like can I even get home?"
Joel: "Oh, no, up north of Lake Phalen" (which is like three MILES from us)
Me: OK, so you still have a job, nobody's dead, and you're just sitting at home?
Joel: Right.

ARRGH! Well anyway. He had gotten a little more worked-up about the job thing than was maybe merited -- the phrasing of "eliminated" and "terminated" were just HR mumbo-jumbo (we think), and it's all going to be OK. Phew!