Joel had an unexpected business trip come up so he's in Harrisburg, PA for about 30 hours, returning today. Once again I am floored by the shock of being a single mom -- it is IMPOSSIBLE. Now, I realize I'm spoiled by a husband who's home every evening right on time, and who does so much cleaning and housework and baby-care. But even given that, I have to say I had a really hard time of it last night with Lu.
We got home after work and she wanted to eat right away. Par for the course -- so I whipped up her bottle, which she drank most of, quickly, and we moved on to cereal, fruits and veggies. Well. That lasted through about 3/4 of the cereal (mixed with pureed banana). All of a sudden, she starts grabbing for the spoon. Great! I think... she wants to feed herself! Well, no... she grabs the spoon and FLINGS it. And grabs a fistful of the cereal mess. And then flings that. And it's on her hand, making it all goopy, so she flails her hand a bit to get rid of it. So there's banana in her hair. All over the chair. Everywhere. On her dress. What a mess. I confess.
Right. So we try green beans -- to the same effect, accompanied by screaming. And she's shrugging one shoulder, and I'm thinking: ear infection? teething? Who even knows. So we toodle around the kitchen, and this makes her happy, and we leave green-bean handprints on the stove and the cupboards and we collapse on a heap in the living room until Jean comes over to save me.
Which she does, of course, with flying colors (she even bought dinner!). Which of course is SUPER AWESOME but I feel so pathetic for needing help so badly! I mean, tons of people do this alone, with four or five or more kids, and I'm sure they're just as tired, and why am I such a wuss??
At this point, the idea of having more kids is really and truly more than I can bear. Because I feel like Lu is pretty well-behaved for a baby. But I cannot even conceive (pun acknowledged) of going through this again... and again(??)... especially having the older one(s) to have to amuse too.
Or maybe she's not that "easy" of a kid. How am I supposed to know? I have NO experience with babies until now. She sleeps great, and has eaten just about everything we've given her. I guess those shouldn't be the only measures. Maybe she should be able to entertain herself a bit better... it does seem to be a theme with our dependents (Hobo is extremely needy and clingy too). I need some objectivity on this. Or maybe it's the subjectivity of an experienced mom to tell me it's going to be okay. I need something! Maybe ice cream.
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4 comments:
I definitely recommend the ice cream.
Actually, a friend of mine's husband had to work late quite a lot when their daughter was about Lu's age, and you would not believe the change in her when Daddy wasn't around on his usual schedule. Kids are creatures of habit, and when their environment changes and they don't have the stability they're used to, they can get incredibly upset by it, and of course they can't say, "Hey, what's the deal with Dad not being here?" so instead they throw tantrums...or spoons and food.
Of course, it could just be that she's getting willful, not that that's any better. Might want to buy a copy of Dr. Dobson's "The Strong-Willed Child" just in case. :)
Update: no ice cream but I made a rhubarb/cherry crumble that is out of this world. Mmmmmmm.
Speaking of books, I could use a recommendation or two. (I'm going to try to hold off on Dobson until she hits at least year, LOL.) What'cha got?
Mom's are great at multitasking! You may seem overwhelmed but in reality you are doing great! Wait until you have 2 and one is trying to get koolaid out of the fridge (from a jug that outweighs him)and you are running to help while still breast feeding! The last time I was out to visit I was amazed at how well you took care of yourself-napping, drinking water, sitting to feed your baby--You can do that?? I just think that it is amazing how much more often we have to clean our homes and in so much more detail. That flung food can get in crazy places. As for the husbands you just have to work together. It is wonderful to have my hubby home to take care of the kids and help me to keep up with the house. If we didn't do it together things would really be a mess!!! But as it generally works out here, one stays at home with the kids and the other goes out and about. That way the kids stay on their schedule and the parent out can actually get things done (reletively stress free).
Hey Anonymous, who are you?? I am running on little sleep and no coffee and I have a headache but I am having trouble sleuthing you out. Thanks for the kind words though.
Meg
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